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Yes, it is generally okay to oversize a well pressure tank, and it will not harm your well system. The primary advantage is that a larger tank reduces frequent pump cycling, leading to longer, slower cycles with fewer startups. This can result in less wear and tear, potentially increasing the lifespan of the pump and conserving energy. However, there are drawbacks to consider. Oversized tanks have a higher upfront cost and require more physical space. While not necessarily a bad thing, opting for a tank that is appropriately sized for your well is often the most efficient choice in terms of cost and space.

While dry wells can be effective for managing rainwater, they have several disadvantages. They can become clogged with sediment, especially after large storms, which reduces their effectiveness and can be difficult to clean. Dry wells are also not suitable for all soil types; they will not function properly in soil with low permeability. Additionally, if a dry well is not large enough to handle the amount of rainfall in your area, it can overflow. For gravity-flow models, the water may disperse very slowly, depending on the well's depth and the soil's permeability.

Age is certainly a factor in well pump failure. The older your pump, the more likely it is to fail. 

Beyond age, other factors can cause your well pump to fail, too. Things like poor water quality can cause sediment buildup in your pump. Without proper cleaning, your pump can seize up and fail. Having a dry well for too long can also cause your pump to fail, as it keeps working even though there's no water for it to pull. 

The bacteria already present in your septic system should be enough to break down solids in a properly maintained septic tank. However, if you’re in a DIY mood, you can try adding (well-mashed) rotten tomatoes to help the good bacteria fulfill their duty. Just make sure you give them a couple hours to work after flushing them down.